Golfing Quips!

> Ten Best Caddy Responses
> > Number :10
> Golfer: "I think I'm going to drown myself in the lake."
> Caddy: "Think you can keep your head down that long, sir?"

> Number : 9
> Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course."
> Caddy: "Try heaven sir, you've already moved most of the earth."
>
> Number : 8
> Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
> Caddy: "Yes sir . . . . You miss the ball much closer now."
>
> Number : 7
> Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?"
> Caddy: "Eventually, sir."
>
> Number : 6
> Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."
> Caddy: "I don't think so sir . . . That would be too much of a coincidence."
>
> Number : 5
> Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much of a distraction."
> Caddy: "It's not a watch sir - it's a compass."
>
> Number : 4
> Golfer: "How do you like my game?"
> Caddy: "It's very good sir - but personally, I prefer golf."
>
> Number : 3
> Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?
> Caddy: "I'm afraid the way you play sir, it's a sin on any day."
>
> Number : 2
> Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on."
> Caddy: "But this isn't the golf course . . . We left that an hour ago sir."
>
> And the Number : 1 . . . . Best Caddy Comment:
> Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old."
> Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir."
>
> Bonus . . .
> An old favourite . . . about the Golfer who has been slicing off the tee at every hole . . .
>
> He finally gives up and asks his long suffering caddy . . .
> Golfer: "Can you see any obvious problems . . . ?"
> Caddy: "There's a piece of sh!t on the end of your club."
> The Golfer picks up his club and cleans the club face . . .
> Caddy: "No sir, it’s at the other end"