Wednesday Jokes!

After queuing up at the Tesco checkout this morning, Mr Patel said to the Cashier, "Can you do this any cheaper?"

"I'm afraid not," she replied, "If we did it for you then we'd have to do it For everybody."

Mr Patel said, "Yeah, but it's got today's date on it. If nobody buys it then it's just going to get thrown away."

"Look sir, you're holding up the queue. Do you want the newspaper or not?!"

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7 wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40

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A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.

Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche...

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Just A Reminder to those who stole Electrical Goods in Last Years Riots....

Your One Year Manufacturers Warranty Runs Out Soon.

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ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY" And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai Brothel!!

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2 Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.

Both in hospital...one's in a korma.. The other's got a dodgy tikka!

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In the first few days of the Olympics the Romanians took gold, silver, bronze, Copper, lead and anything else they could get their bloody hands on.

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Sailing results are in, GB took gold, USA took silver and Somalia took a middle aged couple from Weymouth.

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An Englishman has started his own business in Afghanistan! He is making land mines that look like prayer mats!.

It’s doing well! Prophets are going through The roof!